Speaking Pleasant Words

“A wise man’s heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction. Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” *  

            Remember Charles Shultz’ famous “Peanuts” cartoon strips that used to appear in the comic section of the newspaper? Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Lucy, Linus, Woodstock…such lovable, laughable characters.

While I laughed at Snoopy and the rest of the gang, they were easy to relate to. I could identify with their weaknesses as well as their strengths.  Lucy, for example, loved to play tricks on Charlie Brown that were often downright mean! Think of the way she would move the football every time Charlie Brown tried to place-kick it!

Those strips in which Lucy set up her Psychiatric stand always made me chuckle, even though her advice was not always helpful, was sometimes hurtful and still cost a nickel! A Psychiatric stand…very unique! 

Recently there was a TV interview of a young boy, Ethan Wargo, who after reading a book about a character who had set up an Insult stand, was motivated to have a stand of his own…a Compliment stand!  With the help of his parents, Ethan put together a little stand outside on the sidewalk, made a sign, and waited for customers. 

Compliments were free and evidently were in great demand, because many of his neighbors stopped by to receive one. Now I don’t remember Lucy ever giving compliments to one of the “Peanuts” gang, but wouldn’t it have been nice, even if out of character?

When I was teaching elementary school, a boy in my third-grade class told me that kids were making fun of him, especially on the playground.  He had a disability that resulted in his being very small and affected his mobility.

I asked him if it would be okay to talk to the class about it, and he agreed. After having a heart-to-heart talk with my students and asking which of them would be willing to be his friends, play with him at recess and stand up for him, several raised their hands. He just beamed—and never brought it up again. That was the beginning of the class “support team” for kids who were feeling hurt or left out, which carried on for several years.

Then, there was Mr. Wuzzle, a furry monster puppet with long arms that wrapped around the “puppeteer’s” neck. My second graders especially loved Mr. Wuzzle, whose lips were moved by my fingers. Whenever I pressed a squeaker in his mouth, he would let out a high-pitched squeak. Although I just lowered my voice, pretending that he was speaking, many times kids would approach me and ask, “Is he real?”

Mr. Wuzzle was a culprit in the class, who often got into trouble. He and I would have “discussions” after lunchtime about what might have transpired on the playground. Sometimes, Mr. Wuzzle would have to make an apology, which he always reluctantly did!

 Our dialogs were centered around putting each other up and complimenting each other, with the students participating too. Of course, not only the children but also their teacher had to learn how to speak kindly to others and how to say nice things about them.

To be honest, I’m still learning that lesson. There was a situation recently when I began talking with a parent during our grandson’s tennis match, and passed along some second-hand information about a member of the team without knowing if it was true. It was not necessary to have shared that information; and later, I felt guilty about bringing it up in the first place.

 My comment didn’t pass the “sieve” test, a story credited to Socrates. If information is to be shared about someone else, it should first pass through three mental sieves: Is it true? Good? Necessary? If not, don’t say it!

 Another way of looking at it is through the lens of Jesus’ teaching known as the Golden Rule: “So in everything, do to others, what you would have them do to you…” (Matthew 7:12a)

“In everything” includes the way we speak to people directly, and the way we speak about them to others. I have yet to apologize to that parent, something that needs to be addressed when the next opportunity arises.

 

Dear Lord, help us to speak kind words, words that build up and edify others. May the words of our mouths be pleasing to you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

*Proverbs 16:23-24 NIV